A father and his small son were standing in front of the tiger’s cage at the zoo. Father was explaining how ferocious and strong tigers are, and junior was taking it all in with a serious expression. Dad,” the boy said finally, “if the tiger got out of his cage and ate you up …” […]

Starting his new job at the zoo, the eager young zoo keeper asked the Head keeper what he should do for his first task. “Go and clean out the aquarium” he was told. Arriving at the aquarium, he discovered that all the fish were dead. He rushed back to the head keeper and asked what […]

You don’t see many reindeer in zoos, do you?No. They can’t afford the admission.

My wife asked me to take her to the zoo the other day. I said, “If you want people to see you they can come here and do it!”

Zoo visitor: What’s the new baby hippo’s name? Hippopotamus keeper: I don’t know, he won’t tell me.

“Hey, Pop,” pleaded Angelo, “can I go to the zoo to see the monkeys?” “What’s the matter with you?” asked his father. “Why would you wanna go see the monkeys when your Aunt Maud is here?”

Sauer and Tolbert went to the zoo and watched in awe as a lion let loose with a spine-tingling roar. “Let’s get out of here!” said Sauer. “Go on, if’n you want to,” said the other redneck. “But Ah’m stayin’ for the whole movie!”

An enterprising mayor of the city of Granby, Quebec, a community south of Montreal, established a municipal zoo that has become a significant tourist attraction. It has also given rise to many unusual events. Last September one of the star attractions, Arnold, an Indonesian ape, escaped to the dismay of the zoo director. The matter […]

Two young nuns having just been ordained were on a holiday in New York City and were standing in front of the gorilla cage at the Bronx Zoo. The gorilla took one look at this beautiful young nun, bent the bars, lept to the ground and kissed her. Then he went back into his cage, […]

Caller: Finally! I got through! I’ve been trying to call the zoo for hours! Zookeeper: Yes, all our lions were busy!

A Scotsman paying his first visit to a zoo stopped by one of the cages”An’ whut animal would that be ?” he asked the keeper.”Thats a moose from Canada”, came the reply.”A moose !!”, exclaimed the Scotsman. “Hoots, mon, if that’s a moose then they must ha’ rats the size of elephants over there !”

Some vampires went to see Dracula. They said, “Drac, we want to open a zoo. Have you got any advice?” “Yes,” replied Dracula, “have lots of giraffes.”