Customer: There’s something wrong with my hot dogs.Waiter: Sorry, I’m a waiter, not a veterinarian.

Diner: Waiter, please close the window.Waiter: Why, is there a draft?Diner: Yes, it’s blown my steak off the plate three times.

Waiter, waiter! What’s this creepy crawly thing doing in my dinner?Oh, that one ? he comes here every night.

Customer: This fish isn’t as good as what I ordered here last month.Waiter: That’s funny. It’s from the same fish.

Diner: Waitress, the portions are getting smaller.Waiter: It’s just an optical illusion. It’s just that the restaurant has been enlarged.

Why do waiters prefer elephants to flies? Have you ever heard anyone complaining of a elephant in their soup? .

Customer: Waiter, I can’t eat this meal.Waiter: Why not? It looks all right to me.Customer: I don’t have a fork.

Diner: What’s wrong with these eggs I ordered?Waiter: Don’t ask me. I only laid the table.

Waiter: These are the best eggs we’ve had for years.Diner: Well, bring me some you haven’t had around for that long.

How many waiters does it take to change a light bulb?None, a burned out bulb can’t catch a waiter’s eye.

Waiter, there’s a fly swimming in my soup!Then we’ve served you too much soup, the fly should be wading

Waiter, there’s a dead fly in my soup!Yes sir, it’s the hot water that kills them.