Funny Various animal jokes - Page 7

Various animal jokes

How do snails get their shells…

2 May , 2015  

How do snails get their shells all shiny? They use snail polish.

Various animal jokes

What do you call a neurotic oc…

2 May , 2015  

What do you call a neurotic octopus? A crazy, mixed-up squid.

Various animal jokes

What gas do snails prefer? She…

2 May , 2015  

What gas do snails prefer? Shell.

Various animal jokes

What is slimy and wobbly, tast…

2 May , 2015  

What is slimy and wobbly, tastes of raspberry and lives in the seas? A red jellyfish.

Various animal jokes

A snail starts a slow climb up…

2 May , 2015  

A snail starts a slow climb up the trunk of an apple tree. He is watched by a sparrow who can’t help laughing and eventually says “Don’t you know there aren’t any apples on the tree yet?” “Yes,” said the snail, “but there will be by the time I get up there.”

Various animal jokes

Why did the jellyfish’s wife l…

2 May , 2015  

Why did the jellyfish’s wife leave him? He stung her into action.

Various animal jokes

An old lady was considering bu…

2 May , 2015  

An old lady was considering buying a squirrel fur coat. “But will it be all right in the rain?” she asked anxiously. “Oh certainly, ma’am,” said the manager smoothly. “After all, you’ve never seen a squirrel with an umbrella have you?”

Various animal jokes

How do you weigh a whale? On W…

26 Dec , 2014  

How do you weigh a whale? On Whale Weigh Scales.

Various animal jokes

What is the best advice to giv…

26 Dec , 2014  

What is the best advice to give a worm? Sleep late.

Various animal jokes

A family of tortoises went int…

26 Dec , 2014  

A family of tortoises went into a cafe for some ice cream. They sat down and were about to start when Father Tortoise said, “I think it’s going to rain. Junior, will you pop home and fetch my umbrella?” So off went junior for Father’s umbrella, but three days later he still hadn’t returned. “I […]

Various animal jokes

Deep within a forest a little …

26 Dec , 2014  

Deep within a forest a little turtle began to climb a tree. After hours of effort he reached the top, jumped into the air waving his front legs and crashed to the ground. After recovering, he slowly climbed the tree again, jumped, and fell to the ground. The turtle tried again and again while a […]

Various animal jokes

There once was a baby elephant…

26 Dec , 2014  

There once was a baby elephant and a baby turtle drinking from a river deep in the jungle. For no reason, the turtle reaches over and bites the elephant’s tail, really hard. Years and years later, the same elephant, now grown up, is by the same river, having a drink with his giraffe buddy, when […]