Who invented the telephone?The Phoenicians (phone-itions).

How do Iranians speak on the telephone?Persian-to-Persian (person-to-person).

How did the telephones get married ?In a double ring ceremony !

What do you call a telephone call from one vicar to another ?A parson to parson call !

What do you get if you cross a telephone and a marriage bureau ?A wedding ring !

What do you get if you cross a pig and a telephone ?A lot of crackling on the line !

When doesn’t a telephone work underwater? When it’s wringing wet!

Caller: Operator! Operator! Do you know my boyfriend’s line has been busy for an hour? Operator: No, but if you hum a few bars, I might be able to sing along with you.

What do you get when you cross a telephone with a pair of pants? Bell-bottoms!

If you cross a telephone and a pair of scissors, what do you get?Snippy answers.

What kind of phone makes music?A saxophone.

Mother: Why was the phone busy all night?Babysitter: The fire department put me on hold.