Tyson’s psychologist told Mike to take a year off, he obviously misunderstood….good thing he didn’t say two!
Q: How do the Dallas Cowboys spend their first week at spring training?A: Studying their Miranda Rights.
The Pope met with the College of Cardinals to discuss a proposal from Shimon Peres, the former leader of Israel. “Your holiness,” said one of the Cardinals, “Mr. Peres wants to determine whether Jews or Catholics are superior, by challenging you to a golf match.” The Pope was greatly disturbed, as he had never held […]
Fred got home from his Sunday round of golf later than normal and very tired. “Bad day at the course?” his wife asked. “Everything was going fine,” he said. “Then Harry had a heart attack and died on the 10th tee.” “Oh, that’s awful!” “You’re not kidding. For the whole back nine it was hit […]
A man is stranded on a desert island, all alone for ten years. One day, he sees a speck in the horizon. He thinks to himself, “It’s not a ship.” The speck gets a little closer and he thinks, “It’s not a boat.” The speck gets even closer and he thinks, “It’s not a raft.” […]
The schoolteacher was taking her first golfing lesson.”Is the word spelt p-u-t or p-u-t-t?” she asked the instructor.”P-u-t-t is correct,” he replied.”Put means to place a thing where you want it. Putt means merely a vain attempt to do the same thing.”
Two college basketball players were taking an important final exam. If they failed, they would be on academic probation and not allowed to play in the big game the following week. The exam was fill-in-the-blank.The last question read, “Old MacDonald had a ________.”Bubba was stumped. He had no idea what to answer. But he knew […]
There was a Packers fan with a really crappy seat at Lambeau. Looking with his binoculars, he spotted an empty seat on the 50-yard line. Thinking to himself “what a waste” he made his way down to the empty seat. When he arrived at the seat, he asked the man sitting next to it, “Is […]
St. Peter and Satan were having an argument one day about baseball. Satan proposed a game to be played on neutral grounds between a select team from the heavenly host and his own hand-picked boys.”Very well,” said the gatekeeper of Heaven. “But you realize, I hope, that we’ve got all the good players and the […]
A guy took his girlfriend to her first football game. Afterward he asked her how she liked the game.”I liked it, but I couldn’t understand why they were killing each other for 25 cents,” she said.”What do you mean?” he asked.”Well, everyone kept yelling, ‘Get the quarter back!’”
Coming home from his Little League game, Billy swung open the front door very excited. Unable to attend the game, his father immediately wanted to know what happened. “So, how did you do son?” he asked.”You’ll never believe it!” Billy said. “I was responsible for the winning run!””Really? How’d you do that?” “I dropped the […]
