“How was your golf game, dear?” asked Jack’s wife Tracy.”Well, I was hitting pretty well, but my eyesight’s gotten so bad, Icouldn’t see where the ball went.””You’re seventy-five years old, Jack!” admonished his wife. “Why don’t you take my brother Scott along?””But he’s eighty-five and doesn’t even play golf anymore,” protested Jack.”Yes, but he’s got […]
A golfer, playing a round by himself, is about to tee off, and a greasy little salesman runs up to him, and yells, “Wait! Before you tee off, I have something really amazing to show you!” The golfer, annoyed, says, “What is it?” “It’s a special golf ball,” says the salesman. “You can never lose […]
Golfer: “I’ve played so poorly all day; I think I’m going to go drown myself in that lake.”Caddy: “I doubt you could keep your head down that long.”
Golfer: “I’d move heaven and earth to be able to break 100 on this course.”Caddy: “Try heaven. You’ve already moved most of the earth.”
Golfer: “Well, I have never played this badly before!Caddy: “I didn’t realize you had played before, sir.”
Golfer: “Caddy, do you think my game is improving?”Caddy: “Oh yes, sir! You miss the ball much closer than you used to.”
Golfer: “Please stop checking your watch all the time, caddy. It’s distracting!”Caddy: “This isn’t a watch, sir, its a compass!”
Golfer: “Caddy, do you think it is a sin to play golf on Sunday?”Caddy: “The way you play, sir, it’s a sin any day of the week!”
Golfer: “This golf is a funny game.”Caddy: “It’s not supposed to be.”
Golfer: “That can’t be my ball, caddy. It looks far too old.”Caddy: “It’s a long time since we started, sir.”
Golfer: “Do you think I can get there with a 5-iron?”Caddy: “Eventually.”
