Manager: I thought I told you to lose weight. What happened to your three week diet ?Player: I finished it in three days !
Q: What’s the difference between a bad golfer and a bad skydiver?A: A bad golfer goes, WHACK! “Damn.” A bad skydiver goes, “Damn.” WHACK!
Manager: Twenty teams in the league and you lot finish bottom ?Captain: Well, it could have been worse.Manager: How ?Captain: There could have been more teams in the league !
Q: What did the football say to the football player?A: I get a kick out of you.
Why are football grounds odd ?Because you can sit in the stands but can’t stand in the sits !
Bob and Tom both like to golf. One day Bob went to Tom and said, “Hey look at this great ball!” Tom replied, “What’s so great about it?” Bob said, “Well if you lose it, it will beep until you find it, and if it goes into the water it will float. This ball is […]
What part of a football ground is never the same ?The changing rooms !
What should a football team do if the pitch is flooded ?Bring on their subs !
Did you hear about the football team who ate too much pudding ?They got jellygated !
Ref:I’m sending you off Player: What for ?Ref: The rest of the match !
