Teacher: If I gave you three rabbits today and five rabbits tomorrow, how many rabbits would you have?Jackie: Nine.Teacher: That’s not right, you’d have eight.Jackie: No, Teacher, I’d have nine. I already have one rabbit at home!

Mother: Did you enjoy the school outing, dear ?Jane: Yes, and we’re going again tomorrow.Mother: Really ? Why’s that ?Jane: To try and find the kids we left behind.

Why were you late ?Sorry, teacher, I overslept.You mean you need to sleep at home too !

Teacher: That’s quite a cough you have there, what are you taking for it ?Pupil: I don’t know teacher. What will you give me ?

Our teacher talks to herself does yours ?Yes, but she does’t realise it, she thinks we’re actually listening !

A school teacher injured his back and had to wear a plaster cast around the upper part of his body. He wore it under his shirt and it was not noticeable at all. On the first day of the term, still with the cast under his shirt, he found himself assigned to the toughest class […]

Did you hear what happened when there was an epidemic of laryngitis at school? The school nurse sent everyone to the croakroom.

Teacher: Why do you want to work in a bank, Alan? Fred: ‘Cuz there’s money in it, sir.

Teacher: Didn’t you know the bell had gone? Fred: I didn’t take it, Miss.

What’s the longest piece of furniture in the school? The multiplication table.

Teacher: What happened to your homework? Pupil: I made it into a paper plane and someone hijacked it.

School Principal: I’ve called you into my office, Peter, because I want to talk to you about two words I wish you wouldn’t use so often. One is “great” and the other is “lousy.” Peter: Certainly, sir. What are they?