If you had one dollar and you asked your father for another, how many dollars would you have? One dollar. You don’t know your arithmetic. You don’t know my father !
Teacher: Where is the English Channel ?Pupil: I don’t know, my TV doesn’t pick it up
Jackie stood quietly as her father examined her report card.”What is this 45 in math?” asked her father.”I think that’s the size of the class,” she said quickly!
Teacher: Why does the statue of liberty stand in New York harbour ?Pupil: Because it can’t sit down !
If I had five coconuts and I gave you three, how many would I have left ?I don’t know.Why not ?In our school we do all our arithmetic in apples and oranges.
Teacher: Give me three reasons why the world is roundPupil: Well my dad says so, my mum says so and you say so !
Teacher: Are you good at math ?Pupil: Yes and noTeacher: What do you mean ?Pupil: Yes, I’m no good at math !
Teacher: What’s 2 and 2Pupil: 4Teacher: That’s goodPupil: Good ?, that’s perfect !
Teacher: How much is half of 8Pupil: Up and down or across ?Teacher: What do you mean ?Pupil: Well,up and down makes a 3 or across the middle leaves a 0
The teacher was reviewing counting with her first-grade class. “Jackie,” she asked, “can you count to 10 without mistakes?””Yes,” said Jackie, and she did.”Now, Fred,” said the teacher, “can you count from 10 to 20?””That depends,” said Fred, “with or without mistakes”!
Teacher: Can you count to 10?Fred: Yes, teacher-one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten.Teacher: Now go on from there.Fred: Jack, Queen, King.
Teacher: If I lay one egg here and another there, how many eggs will there be?Fred: None!Fred (surprised): Why not?Fred: Because you can’t lay eggs!
