A professor was giving a big test one day to his students. He handed out all of the tests and went back to his desk to wait. Once the test was over, the students all handed the tests back in. The professor noticed that one of the students had attached a $100 bill to his […]

One day our professor was discussing a particularly complicated concept. A pre-med student rudely interrupted to ask, “Why do we have to learn this pointless information””To save lives.” the professor responded quickly and continued the lecture.A few minutes later, the same student spoke up again. “So how does physics save lives?” he persisted.”It keeps the […]

A student called up his Mom one evening from his college and asked her for some money, because he was broke.His Mother said, “Sure, sweetie. I will send you some money. You also left your economics book here when you visited two weeks ago. Do you want me to send that up too?””Uhh, oh yeah, […]

Introductory Chemistry was taught at Duke University for many years by professor Bonk. One year, two guys took the class and did pretty well on all the quizzes and mid-terms–so much so that going into the final, they each had a solid A. These two friends were so confident going into the final that the […]

A student comes to a young professor’s office hours. She glances down the hall, closes his door, kneels pleadingly.”I would do anything to pass this exam.” She leans closer to him, flips back her hair, gazes meaningfully into his eyes. “I mean…” she whispers, “…I would do…anything.” He returns her gaze. “Anything?” “Anything.” His voice […]

Man: “How’s your history paper coming?”Woman: “Well, my history professor suggested that I use the Internet for research, and it’s been very helpful. Man: “Really?”Woman: “Yes! I’ve already located 17 people who sell them!”

Why do teachers use a bamboo cane?Because when the cane goes ‘bam’ the child goes boo!

Sandy began a job as an elementary school counselor and she was eager to help. One day during recess she noticed a girl standing by herself on one side of a playing field while the rest of the kids enjoyed a game of soccer at the other.Sandy approached and asked if she was all right. […]

I’m not going back to school ever againWhy ever not?The teacher doesn’t know a thing, all she does is ask questions!

Fred came home from his first day at school. “Nothing exciting happened”, he told his mother, “Except the teacher didn’t know how to spell cat so I told her”

What happens if you draw on the blackboard and the teacher told you not to?She draws a smack!

Pupil: I don’t think I deserved zero on this test!Teacher: I agree, but that’s the lowest mark I could give you!