Q. What excuse did Adam give to his children as to why he no longer lived in Eden?A. Your mother ate us out of house and home.
Q. Who is the greatest babysitter mentioned in the Bible?A. David. He rocked Goliath to sleep.
Q. Why was Goliath so surprised when David hit him with a slingshot?A. The thought had never entered his head before.
O’Toole worked in the lumber yard for twenty years and all that time he’d been stealing the wood and selling it. At last his conscience began to bother him and he went to confession to repent. “Father, it’s 15 years since my last confession, and I’ve been stealing wood from the lumber yard all those […]
Q. Who was the greatest financieer in the Bible?A. Noah. He was floating his stock while everyone else was in liquidation.
Q. Who was the greatest female financier in the Bible?A. Pharaoh’s daughter. She went down to the bank of the Nile and drew out a little prophet.
“And how much of that stack of hay did you steal, Kavanaugh?” the priest asked at confession. “I might as well confess to the whole stack, your Reverence,” said Kavanaugh. “I’m goin’ after the rest of it tonight!”
A local priest and pastor stood by the side of the road holding up a sign that said, “The End is Near! Turn yourself around now before it’s too late!” They planned to hold up the sign to each passing car. “Leave us alone you religious nuts!” yelled the first driver as he sped by. […]
A little girl spoke to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it is a very large mammal, its throat is very small. The little girl said, “But how can that be? Jonah was swallowed by a whale.” Irritated, the teacher […]
Old Mrs. Watkins awoke one spring morning to find that the river had flooded the entire first floor of her house. Looking out of her window, she saw that the water was still rising.Two men passing by on a rowboat shouted up an invitation to row to safety with them. “No, thank you,” Mrs. Watkins […]
A priest was called away for an emergency. Not wanting to leave the confessional unattended, he called his rabbi friend from across the street and asked him to cover for him.The rabbi told him he wouldn’t know what to say, but the priest told him to come on over and he’d stay with him for […]
