It seems that there was a little old church out in the countryside: painted white and with a high steeple.One Sunday, the pastor noticed that his church needed painting. He checked out the Sunday ads and found a paint sale. The next day, he went into town and bought a gallon of white paint. He […]
A friend was in front of me coming out of church one day, and the preacher was standing at the door as he always is to shake hands. He grabbed my friend by the hand and pulled him aside.The Pastor said to him, “You need to join the Army of the Lord!” My friend replied, […]
It was about a month ago when a man in Amsterdam felt that he needed to confess, so went to his priest:”Forgive me Father, for I have sinned. During WWII I hid a refugee in my attic.””Well,” answered the priest, “that’s not a sin.””But I made him agree to pay me 20 Gulden for every […]
The two thousand member Baptist church was filled to overflowing capacity one Sunday morning. The preacher was ready to start the sermon when two men, dressed in long black coats and black hats entered thru the rear of the church.One of the two men walked to the middle of the church while the other stayed […]
Q: Why did God create man before woman? A: He didn’t want any advice.
Doctor: ‘Your recovery was a miracle!’ Patient: ‘PRAISE GOD. Now I don’t have to pay you!’
Q: Why did Moses wander in the desert for 40 years? A: Even then men wouldn’t ask for directions!
A Christian man had just died and was on his way to heaven. When he got to the gates of heaven he met an angel. The angel asked him what God’s name was. ‘Oh that’s easy,’ the man replied, ‘His name is Andy.’ ‘What make you think his name is Andy?’ the angel asked incredulously. […]
A Baptist missionary was walking in Africa when he heard the ominous padding of a lion behind him. “Oh Lord,” prayed the missionary, “Grant in Thy goodness that the lion walking behind me is a good Christian lion.” And then, in the silence that followed, the missionary heard the lion praying too: “Oh Lord,” he […]
There is a story about a monastery in Europe perched high on a cliff several hundred feet in the air.The only way to reach the monastery was to be suspended in a basket which was pulled to the top by several monks who pulled and tugged with all their strength.Obviously the ride up the steep […]
A Catholic Priest and a Rabbi were chatting one day when the conversation turned to a discussion of job descriptions and promotion.”What do you have to look forward to in way of a promotion in your job?” asked the Rabbi.”Well, I’m next in line for the Monsignor’s job.” replied the Priest.”Yes, and then what?” asked […]
