Who designed Noah’s ark?An ark-itect !

Q. How do you make holy water?A. Boil the hell out of it.

A Sunday school teacher of preschoolers asked the students to learned one fact about Jesus by the following Sunday. The following week she asked each child in turn what he or she had learned. Susie said, “He was born in a manger.” Bobby said, “He threw the money changers out of the temple.” Little Johnny […]

A kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children whilethey were drawing. She walked around to look at the artwork.As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she askedwhat the drawing was.The girl replied, “I’m drawing God.”The teacher paused and said, “But no one knows what God looks like.Without missing a beat, […]

How do Religious Education teachers mark exams? With spirit levels.

Examiner: I think you know very little, if anything at all, about the Bible. Can you quote any passage? Student: ‘Judas departed and went and hanged himself.’ Examiner: Well, that’s a surprise. Can you quote another? Student: ‘Go thou and do likewise.’

Jill: Have you read the Bible? Jack: No, I’m waiting for the film to come round.

What’s black and white, black and white, black and white? A nun rolling down a hill.

At what time of day was Adam born? Just before Eve.

What did Adam do when he wanted some sugar?He raised Cain.

Who is the fastest runner in history.Adam – because he was the first in the human race.

Three Pastors from the south were having lunch in a diner. One said, “Ya know, since summer started I’ve been having trouble with bats in my loft and attic at church. I’ve tried everything-noise, spray, cats-nothing seems to scare them away. Another said, “Yea, me too. I’ve got hundreds living in my belfry and in […]