‘I can’t find my dollar bill,’ Jane sobbed.’Don’t worry,’ her Counselor said. ‘A dollar doesn’t go very far today.’

Ted said to his friend, ‘can you lend me $10?”But I only have $8,’ his friend replied.That’s OK, you can always owe me the other $2!

If you found a five dollar bill in every pocket of your coat, what would you have ?Someone else’s coat.

A little monster was learning to play the violin,’ I’m good, aren’t I?’ he asked his big brother.’You should be on the radio,’ said his brother.’You think I’m that good?”No, I think you’re terrible, but if you were on the radio, I could switch you off !

Why did your sister feed money to her cow ?Because she wanted to get rich milk.

My sister fell in love at second sight. When she first met him she didn’t know how rich he was.

‘Five dollars for one question!’ said the girl to the fortune-teller.’That’s very expensive,isn’t it ?”Next!’

At the Cedar Rapids Chamber of Commerce meeting the treasurer reported a deficit of two hundred dollars.One of the chamber members stood up and said,”I vote that we donate half of it to the Red Cross and then give the other fifty dollars to the Salvation Army.”

Elmore walked into his favorite truck stop cafe and said to the owner,”Hey, Roy, you wanna take a chance on a raffle?” “Whada ya win?” “A million dollars!” said the redneck. “You get a dollar a year for a million years.” “How much are they each?” “Ten cents. Two for a quarter. Or three for […]

A business man called and had a question about the documents he needed in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded him he needed a visa. “Oh no I don’t, I’ve been to China many times and never had to have one of those.” I double checked, and sure […]

Three boys were walking along the beach one day when they see a cave. The first boy goes in and is looking at a banknote on a big rock when a ghostly voice calls out ” I am the ghost of Auntie Abel and this five dollars stays on the table!” The second boy goes […]

An English teacher asked her class to write an essay on what they’d do if they had a million dollars. Alec handed in a blank sheet of paper. ‘Alec !’ yelled the teacher, ‘you’ve done nothing. Why?”Because if I had a million dollars, that’s exactly what I would do !’