What do you do if you fiend King Kong in the kitchen? Just don’t monkey with him.

What do you get if King Kong sits on your best friend? A flat mate.

What do you get if King Kong sits on your piano? A flat note.

What do you get if King Kong falls down a mine shaft? A flat miner.

Why is King Kong big and hairy? So you can tell him apart from a gooseberry.

What is big, hairy and can fly faster than sound? King Koncord.

What’s big and hairy and climbs up the Empire State Building in a dress? Queen Kong.

How can you mend King Kong’s arm if he’s twisted it?With a monkey wrench.

If King Kong went to Hong Kong to play ping-gong and died, what would they put on his coffin? A lid.

What is as big as King Kong but doesn’t weigh anything? King Kong’s shadow.

What do you get if you cross King Kong with a watchdog? A terrified postman.

Who is the smelliest, hairiest monarch in the world? King Pong.