Reporter: To what do you attribute your old age?Old Man: To the fact that I was born in 1890.
Reporter: What made you go out on that dangerous pond ice and risk your life to save a friend?Boy Hero: I had to do it. He had my skates on.
A newsboy was standing on the corner with a stack of papers, yelling, “Read all about it. Fifty people swindled! Fifty people swindled!”Curious, a man walked over, bought a paper, and checked the front page. Finding nothing, the man said, “There’s nothing in here about fifty people being swindled.”The newsboy ignored him and went on, […]
How many journalists does it take to change a light bulb?”We just report the facts, we don’t change them.”
How many journalists does it take to change a light bulb?”We just report the facts, we don’t change them.” Three. One to report it as an inspired government program to bring light to the people, one to report it as a diabolical government plot to deprive the poor of darkness, and one to win a […]
How many computer journalists does it take to screw in a light bulb?Five. One to write a review of all the existing light bulbs so you can decide which one to buy, another one to write a remarkably similar one in another magazine the next month, a third to have a big one come out […]
How many editors does it take to change a light bulb?Only one, but first he has to rewire the entire building.
A journalist assigned to the Jerusalem bureau takes an apartment overlooking the Wailing Wall. Every day when she looks out, she sees an old Jewish man praying vigorously. So the journalist goes down and introduces herself to the old man. She asks: “You come every day to the wall. How long have you done that […]
A woman telephoned her local newspaper to let them know that she had just given birth to eighteen children. The reporter didn’t quite hear the message and said, “Would you repeat that?” “Not if I can help it,” replied the woman.
George W. Bush is seen crossing the Potomac river on foot.The Washington Post : “President Bush crosses the Potomac River”.The Washington Time : “Bush’s conservative approach saves taxpayers a boat”.Mother Jones : “Bush can’t swim”.
A shy guy goes into a bar and sees a beautiful woman sitting at the bar. After an hour of gathering up his courage, he finally goes over to her and asks tentatively. “Would you mind if I chatted with you for a while?”To which she responds by yelling, at the top of her lungs, […]
A Soviet journalist walks into the hospital and tells the desk nurse, “I want to see the eye-ear doctor.””There is no such doctor” she tells him. “Perhaps you would like to see someone else?””No, I need to see an eye-ear doctor,” he says.”But there is no such doctor,” she replies. “We have doctors for the […]
