Why did the Aggie call 911 in the car wash?- He thought he saw the rotating car washer as a tornado

An Illinois man pretending to have a gun kidnapped a motorist and forced him to drive to two different automated teller machines. The kidnapper then proceeded to withdraw money from his own bank accounts.

A 9-year-old boy in Manassas, Virginia received a one-day suspension under his elementary school’s drug policy last week – for Certs! Joey Hoeffer allegedly told a classmate that the mints would make him “jump higher.”

A student in Belle, West Virginia was suspended for three days for giving a classmate a cough drop. School principal Forest Mann reiterated the school’s “zero-tolerance” policy…not to be confused with the “zero-intelligence” policy.

Fire investigators on Maui have determined the cause of a blaze that destroyed a $127,000 home last month – a short in the homeowner’s newly installed fire prevention alarm system. “This is even worse than last year,” said the distraught homeowner, “when someone broke in and stole my new security system…”

He is so dumb, he thinks an agent is someone who keeps track of your age!

Why did the stupid boy wear a turtle neck sweater?To hide his flea collar.

A boy went into the local department store where he saw a sign on the escalator – ‘Dogs must be carried on this escalator.’The boy then spent the next tow hours looking for a dog.

A silly boy spent the afternoon with some friends, but when the time came for him to leave, a terrific storm started with thunder, lightning and torrential rain.’You can’t go home in this,’ said one of his friends, ‘ you’d better stay the night.”That’s very kind of you,’ said the boy. ‘ I’ll just run […]

My friend is so silly that he spent two weeks in a revolving door looking for the doorknob!

Sister: Why are you putting the saddle on backward ? Brother: How do you know which way I’m going ?

A guy walking down a street one afternoon passes an old man sitting on the side of the road with a large sack.The younger guy says to the old man, “Watcha got in the sack?”The old man responds, “I got some monkeys in that there sack.”The younger man asks, “If I guess how many monkeys […]