A stupid man was struggling out of his house with a big table. His neighbor said to him, “Hello, Harry. Where are you going with that then?” And Harry replied, “I’m taking it to the store to have it measured for a new tablecloth.”

An Irishman saw a notice outside a police station which read: MAN WANTED FOR ROBBERY. So he went in and applied for the job!

Did you hear about the idiot who invented the one-piece jigsaw puzzle?

My friend is so stupid that he thinks twice before saying nothing.

Did you hear about the stupid photographer?He saved burned out lightbulbs for use in his darkroom.

I don’t know what it is that makes you stupid but whatever it is, it works.

My friend is so stupid he thinks that an autograph is a chart showing sales figures for cars.

Did you hear about the stupid woodworm? He was found in a brick.

What do stupid kids do at Halloween? They carve a face on an apple and go bobbing for pumpkins.

A stupid glazier was examining a broken window. He looked at it for a while and then said, “It’s worse than I thought. It’s broken on both sides.”

Did you hear about the stupid wizard? He couldn’t remember if he used to be forgetful.

Did you hear about the idiot who made his chickens drink boiling water? He thought they would lay hard boiled eggs.