Do you feel like a glass of carrot juice? Why? Do I look like one?

Would you like a duck egg for supper? Only if you quack it for me.

What vegetable needs a plumber? A leek.

Knock KnockWho’s there !Bean !Bean who ?Bean working very hard today !

Knock KnockWho’s there !Beef !Beef who ?Beef fair now !

Knock KnockWho’s there !Butter !Butter who ?Butter wrap up – it’s cold out here !

What could you do if you were on a desert island without food or water? Open your watch: drink from the spring, and eat the sand which is (sandwiches) there.

If there were no food left, what could people do?Country people could eat their forest preserves and city people could have their traffic jams.

What do you get if you cross an alien and a hot drink ?Gravi-tea !

Knock KnockWho’s there !Bacon !Bacon who ?Bacon a cake for your birthday !

A fat girl went into a cafe and ordered two slices of apple pie with four scoops of ice cream cover with lashings of raspberry sauce and piles of chopped nuts.’Would you like a cherry on the top ?’ asked the waitress.’No, thanks,’ said the girl, ‘I’m on a diet !’

Camper: There’s something wrong with my hot dog.Cook: Don’t tell me. I’m not a veterinarian.