Why is a dog like a baseball player?He runs for home when he sees the catcher coming.

How did the dog make anti-freeze?He stole her blanket.

What do you call an alcoholic dog ?A whino !

Alsation: How did you find the fleas? Beagle: I didn’t! They found me!

Where will a springer spaniel never shop? At a flea market!

What is your dog’s favorite breakfast? Pooched eggs!

How do you make a dog float?Take two scoops of ice cream, a couple of squirts of soda and a small dog.

Which dog eats with its tail?All dogs keep their tails on when eating.

If a beagle can’t play a bugle in the marching band, what’s his other favorite instrument to play? A trombone.

What should you do if you have a basset hound over for dinner? Have a short table!

What dog sweats the most and drinks the most water? A hot-weiler!

What dogs never get lost? Newfound-lands!