A pilot, Michael Jordon, Bill Gates, the Pope, and a pizza delivery man were all in a plane together traveling through stormy conditions.Suddenly, the pilot came running back to the passengers and announced that lightning had hit the plane, and they were going to crash in a matter of minutes. “There are only enough parachutes […]
A Engineer and an Programmer are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The Engineer leans over to the Programmer and asks if he would like to play a fun game. The Programmer just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window […]
A programmer was walking along the beach when he found a lamp. Upon rubbing the lamp a genie appeared who stated “I am the most powerful genie in the world. I can grant you any wish you want, but only one wish.”The programmer pulled out a map of the Mediterranean area and said “I’d like […]
Customer: “My disk is stuck in my disk drive. Clicking eject doesn’t work.” Tech Support: “Ok, turn the power to your Mac off, hold down the mouse clicker, and power the Mac back up.” Customer: “Look, I don’t have three hands!”
Q: What do you call a series of FDIV instructions on a Pentium? A: Successive approximations.
How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?Just one, provided there’s a programmer around to explain how to do it.
Bill Gates suddenly dies and finds himself face to face with God. God stood over Bill Gates and said, “Well Bill, I’m really confused on this one. It’s a tough decision; I’m not sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell. After all, you helped society enormously by putting a computer in almost every […]
As most technophiles are aware, there are special programs to run scanners. These programs use a TWAIN driver to perform the scanning. TWAIN, the acronym, stands for “Technology Without An Interesting Name.”
If Bill Gates had a dime for every time a Windows box crashed…Oh, wait a minute, he already does.
