A system programmer came home from work almost at dawn and told his wife enthusiastically: “Tonight I have installed a new release of MVS/ESA together with VM/CMS and CICS/VS”.”G.O.O.D” answered his wife.
Customer: I think I’ve got a bug in my computer.Repairman: Does your computer make a humming noise?Customer: Yes.Repairman: Then it must be a humbug!
What do you get if you cross a computer with a ballet dancer?The Netcracker suite.
Why did the duck stick his leg into a computer?He wanted to have webbed feet.
A technician received a call from a man complaining that the system wouldn’t read word processing files from his old diskettes. After trouble-shooting for magnets and heat failed to diagnose the problem, it was found that the customer labeled the diskettes then rolled them into his typewriter to type the labels.
Q: How does Bill Gates screw in a lightbulb? A: He doesn’t. He declares darkness the industry standard.
My computer made a funny sound the other day.Of course, I’ve never heard it get thrown out a window before.
A customer called to say he couldn’t get his computer to fax anything. After 40 minutes of trouble-shooting, the technician discovered the man was trying to fax a piece of paper by holding it in front of the screen and pressing the “send” key.
Customer: “It says I’ve performed an illegal operation and will be shut down. Have I done something wrong?”
This truck driver hauling a tractor-trailer load of computers stops for a beer. As he approaches the bar, he sees a big sign on the door saying:”Nerds Not Allowed — Enter At Your Own Risk!”He goes in and sits down. The bartender comes over to him.”You smell kind of nerdy. What do you do for […]
Once a programmer drowned in the sea. Many Marines where at that time on the beach, but the programmer was shouting “F1 F1” and nobody understood it.
