Computers manufacturer is considering changing the command “Press Any Key” to “Press Return Key” because of the flood of calls asking where the “Any” key is.
I heard that if you play the Windows NT 4.0 CD backwards, you’ll get a satanic message. But the most frightening thing is that if you play it forward, it installs NT 4.0!
Dear God: Yesterday was an awful day for me…My husband ran off with his secretary,My son pierced his eyebrow,My daughter tattooed the bald spot on her head,My dog mated with the neighbors cat,My neighbor sold her house to a mental institution,My Mom told me I was adopted,My Dad told me he’s gay,My boss told me […]
A customer needed help setting up a new program, so the technician suggested he go to the local Egghead. “Yeah, I got me a couple of friends,” the man said. When told Egghead was a software store, the man said, “Oh, I thought you meant for me to find a couple of geeks.”
Tech Support: “Which format are the images you send?” Customer: “Rectangular, 15×11 centimeters.”
A tech support employee once received a call from a disgruntled lady who had purchase one of their PCs. “The cup holder on my computer broke! I just got some coffee and put it in the cup holder and then it broke, and the coffee spilled all over me! I want a replacement!” The employee […]
The boy is smoking and leaving smoke rings into the air.The girl gets irritated with the smoke and says to her lover: “Can’t you see the warning written on the cigarettes packet, smoking is injurious to health!”The boy replies back: “Darling, I am a programmer. We don’t worry about warnings, we only worry about errors.”
How do you stop your laptop batteries from running out?Hide their trainers.
What do you get if you stuff your computer’s disk drive with herbs?A thyme machine.
Why do computer teachers never get sick?Because an apple a day keeps the doctor away.
The Three Laws of Secure Computing1) Don’t buy a computer.2) If you do buy a computer, don’t plug it in.3) If you do plug it in, sell it and return to step 1.
….. Ya see, we at Microsoft believe in making computing easier! What could be easier for consumers than having only ONE choice of software?!?
