“This little computer,” said the sales clerk, “will do half of your job for you.” Studying the machine, the senior VP said, “Fine, I’ll take two.”
Why was there a bug in the computer?It was looking for a byte to eat.
A software verifier read in the Bible that God protects all fools, and decided to test it empirically. He jumped out of the window and broke a leg. There he lies, writhing in pain, and happily thinks: “I never really considered myself a fool, but I never knew I was THAT clever!”
Teacher: Look at the state of the school computer. I want that screen cleaned so I can see my face in it!Pupil: But then it will crack and we won’t be able to use it at all.
An office technician got a call from a user. The user told the tech that her computer was not working. She described the problem and the tech concluded that the computer needed to be brought in and serviced.He told her to “Unplug the power cord and bring it up here and I will fix it.”About […]
Comments made by Programmers when their programs don’t work: Strange… I’ve never heard about that. It did work yesterday. Well, the program needs some fixing. How is this possible? The machine seems to be broken. Has the operating system been updated? The user has made an error again. There is something wrong in your test […]
Q: How many Microsoft support staff does it take to change a light bulb?A: Four. One to ask “What is the registration number of the light bulb?”, one to ask “Have you tried rebooting it?”, another to ask “Have you tried reinstalling it?” and the last one to say “It must be your hardware because […]
Five cannibals get appointed as programmers in an IT company.During the welcoming ceremony the boss says: “You’re all part of our team now. You can earn good money here, and you can go to the company canteen for something to eat. So don’t trouble the other employees.”The cannibals promise not to trouble the other employees.Four […]
How many maintenance programmers does it take to change a light bulb?None. They try to fix the old one.”We looked at the light fixture and decided there’s no point trying to maintain it. We’re going to rewrite it from scratch. Could you wait two months?”
