Father Christmas: I thought I asked you to go out there and clear the snow!I’m on my way, Father Christmas.Father Christmas: But you only have one welly on!That’s all right! There’s only one foot of snow!
I remember when Father Christmas first passed his sleigh-driving test. He came skidding down in front of the toy factory.’Have you passed?’ I asked.Father Christmas pointly proudly to the front of the sleigh. ‘See for yourself!’ he called proudly. ‘No-el plates!’
A group of mountain climbers once heard Father Christmas go past.They must have had sharp ears!They were mountain-ears!
One time Father Christmas lost his underpants.That’s how he got the name Saint Knickerless!
Dear Father Christmas, could you please send me some Crocodile shoes!.Father Christmas: Can’t do that one. He hasn’t said what size his crocodile takes!
Dear Father Christmas, this Christmas could you please send me a yellow door.Yours, Sherlock HolmesWatson: So why do you want a yellow door Holmes?Lemon-entry my dear watson.
‘Father Christmas has two reindeer. He calls one Edward and the other one Edward! I bet you can’t tell me why he does that!”Oh, yes I can.’ the elf said.’Because tow ‘Eds are better than one, of course!’
