Boy: Grandma, do you know how to croak. Grandma: No, I don’t think so. Why? Boy: Because Daddy says he’ll be a rich man when you do.

Why was the mother flea feeling down in the dumps? Because she thought her children were all going to the dogs.

“What were you before you came to school, boys and girls?” asked the teacher, hoping that someone would say “babies.” She was disappointed when all the children cried out, “Happy!”

Mrs Smith, the biology teacher, was very fond of fish. She was also rather deaf, which was great for the children in her class. “What Mrs Smith needs,” said one of her colleagues, “is a herring-aid.”

Why was the lightning bug unhappy?Because her children were not very bright.

Tyler was excited about his first day at school. So excited in fact, that only a few minutes after class started, he realized that he desperately needed to go to the bathroom. So, Tyler raised his hand politely to ask if he could be excused. Of course, the teacher said yes, but asked Tyler to […]

Little Johnny came home from school with a note from his teacher saying that Johnny was having trouble telling the difference between boys and girls, and would his mother please sit down and have a talk with Johnny about this. So Johnny’s mother takes him quietly by the hand upstairs to her bedroom, and closes […]

A little girl was playing in the garden when she spied two spiders mating. “Daddy, what are those two spiders doing?” she asked. “They’re mating,” her father replied. “What do you call the spider on top, Daddy?” she asked. “That’s a daddy long legs,” her father answered. “So, the other one is a mommy long […]

A man is walking down the street one day when he notices a very small boy trying to press a doorbell on a house across the street. However, the boy is very small and the doorbell is too high for him to reach. After watching the boy’s efforts for some time, the man moves closer […]

A precious little girl walks into a pet shop and asks in the sweetest little lisp, “Excuthe me, mithter, do you keep widdle wabbits?” As the shopkeeper’s heart melts, he gets down on his knees, so that he’s on her level, and asks, “Do you want a widdle white wabby or a thoft and fuwwy […]

On a special teacher’s day, a kindergarten teacher was receiving gifts from her pupils. The florist’s son handed her a gift. She shooked it, held it over her head, and said, “I bet I know what it is – flowers!””That’s right!” said the boy, “but how did you know?””Just a wild guess,” she said.The next […]

On the way to preschool, the doctor had left her stethoscope on the car seat, and her little girl picked it up and began playing with it.’Be still, my heart,’ thought my friend, ‘my daughter wants to follow in my footsteps!’ Then the child spoke to the instrument: “Welcome to McDonald’s. May I take your […]