“When you exit the bus, please be sure to lower your head and watch your step.””If you miss your step and hit your head, please lower your voice and watch your language. Thank you.”
A driver tucked this note under the windshield wiper of his automobile. “I’ve circled the block for 20 minutes. I’m late for an appointment, and if I don’t park here I’ll lose my job. Forgive us our trespasses.” When he came back he found a parking ticket and this note: “I’ve circled the block for […]
A guy driving a Yugo pulled up to a stoplight next to a Rolls-Royce. He rolled down his window and shouted to the driver of the Rolls. “Hey, buddy, that’s a nice car. You got a phone in your Rolls? I’ve got a phone in my Yugo!” The driver of the Rolls looked over and […]
Q: What can you do to help ease a heavy traffic problem?A: Carry loaded weapons.
Q: What is the difference between a flashing red traffic light and a flashing yellow traffic light?A: The color.
Q: What changes would occur in your lifestyle if you could no longer drive lawfully?A: I would be forced to drive unlawfully.
Q: How can you reduce the possibility of having an accident?A: Be too drunk to find your keys.
Q: Do you yield when a blind pedestrian is crossing the road?A: What for? He can’t see my license plate.
Q: Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop at the same time?A: The pick up truck with the gun rack and the bumper sticker saying, “Guns don’t kill people. I do.”
A young man comes home and says “Dad, just got my driver’s license and would like to use the family car.”Father replies, :”O.K., son. But, first, you have to get good grades in school, keep your room clean, make the yard is neat, and cut your hair. Come back in a few months and then […]
