Funny Accountant jokes - Page 6

Accountant jokes

There once was an accountant w…

8 Jul , 2009  

There once was an accountant who lived her whole life without ever taking advantage of any of the people she worked for. In fact, she made sure that every job she did resulted in a win-win situation.One day while walking down the street she was tragically hit by a bus and she died. Her soul […]

Accountant jokes

What’s an actuary?An accountan…

8 Jul , 2009  

What’s an actuary?An accountant without the sense of humour.

Accountant jokes

How do you know accountants ha…

8 Jul , 2009  

How do you know accountants have no imagination?They named a firm PricewaterhouseCoopers.

Accountant jokes

What’s a shy and retiring acco…

8 Jul , 2009  

What’s a shy and retiring accountant?An accountant who is half a million shy and that’s why he’s retiring.

Accountant jokes

A man walking along a country …

8 Jul , 2009  

A man walking along a country road comes across a farmer droving a huge mob of sheep. He stops and chats for a while and then says, “Tell you what, I’ll bet you $100 against one of your sheep that I can tell you the exact number in that flock.”The farmer thinks for a moment, […]

Accountant jokes

Why do some accountants decide…

8 Jul , 2009  

Why do some accountants decide to become actuaries?They find bookkeeping too exciting.

Accountant jokes

There are three kinds of accou…

8 Jul , 2009  

There are three kinds of accountants in the world.Those who can count and those who can’t.

Accountant jokes

A businessman tells his friend…

8 Jul , 2009  

A businessman tells his friend that his company is looking for a new accountant.His friend asks, “Didn’t your company hire a new accountant a few weeks ago?”The businessman replies, “That’s the accountant we’re looking for.”

Accountant jokes

An accountant goes into a pet …

8 Jul , 2009  

An accountant goes into a pet shop to buy a parrot. The shop owner shows him three identical parrots on a perch and says, “The parrot on the left costs $500.””Why does that parrot cost so much?” asks the accountant.”Well,” replies the owner, “it knows how to do complex audits.””How much does the middle parrot […]

Accountant jokes

A patient was at her doctor’s …

11 May , 2009  

A patient was at her doctor’s office after undergoing a complete physical exam. The doctor said, “I have some very grave news for you. You only have six months to live.”The patient asked, “Oh doctor, what should I do?” The doctor replied, “Marry an accountant.” “Will that make me live longer?” asked the patient. “No,” […]

Accountant jokes

An accountant is having a hard…

11 May , 2009  

An accountant is having a hard time sleeping and goes to see his doctor. “Doctor, I just can’t get to sleep at night.””Have you tried counting sheep?””That’s the problem – I make a mistake and then spend three hours trying to find it.”

Accountant jokes

Two accountants are in a bank,…

11 May , 2009  

Two accountants are in a bank, when armed robbers burst in. While several of the robbers take the money from the tellers, others line the customers, including the accountants, up against a wall, and proceed to take their wallets, watches, etc. While this is going on accountant number one jams something in accountant number two’s […]