Why did a footballer take a piece of rope onto the pitch ?He was the skipper !

What did the bumble bee striker say ?Hive scored !

Where do footballers dance ?At a football !

What tea do footballers drink ?Penaltea !

Why did the footballer hold his boot to his ear ?Because he liked sole music !

What does a footballer and a magician have in common ?Both do hat tricks !

What does Paul Inces mum make for Christmas ?Ince pies !

Which England player keeps up the fuel supply ?Paul gas coin !

How did the footbal pitch end up as triangle ?Somebody took a corner !

What’s the chilliest ground in the premiership ?Cold Trafford !

What part of a football pitch smells nicest ?The scenter spot !

What does a basketball player do before he blows out his candles? He makes a swish!