Mother: Why was the phone busy all night?Babysitter: The fire department put me on hold.
The new office-boy came into his boss’s office and said, “I think you’re wanted on the phone, sir.” “What d’you mean, you think?” demanded the boss. “Well, sir, the phone rang, I answered it and a voice said ‘is that you, you old fool?”
Why did Dr Frankenstein have his telephone cut off? Because he wanted to win the Nobel prize!
Who was that on the phone, Fred? Fred: No one important. Just some man who said it was long distance from Australia, so I told him I knew that already and put the phone down !
Willie: “I have an awful toothache.”Tommie: “I’d have it taken out if it was mine.”Willie: “Yes, if it was yours, I would, too.”
Why didn’t the monster use toothpaste? Because he said his teeth weren’t loose.
Mother: Has your tooth stopped hurting yet?…Son: I don’t know. The dentist kept it
Beatrice Lillie (Lady Peel) was once accosted by a haughty old dowager who scrutinized her through her lorgnettes. “What lovely pearls, dear Beatrice,” she maliciously remarked. “Are they real?” Yes, nodded Lady Peel. “Of course,” the dowager declared, “you can always tell real pearls by biting them. May I try?” “Gladly,” Lady Peel replied. “But […]
