Short bad funny jokes - Page 818

Children jokes

A mother was reading a book ab…

11 May , 2009  

A mother was reading a book about animals to her 3 year old daughter. Mother: “What does the cow say?” Child: “Moo!” Mother: “Great! What does the cat say?” Child: “Meow.” Mother: “Oh, you’re so smart! What does the frog say?” And this wide-eyed little 3 year-old looked up at her mother and in her […]

Cat jokes

Q: Where did the kittens go on…

11 May , 2009  

Q: Where did the kittens go on their class trip? – A: To a mewseum.

Cat jokes

Q: When is a bad time to cross…

11 May , 2009  

Q: When is a bad time to cross a black cat?A: When you are a mouse!

Cat jokes

Little Tim was in the garden f…

11 May , 2009  

Little Tim was in the garden filling in a hole when his neighbor peered over the fence. Interested in what the cheeky-faced youngster was up to, he politely asked, “Whatcha doing, Tim?” “My goldfish died,” replied the boy tearfully, without looking up. “And I’ve just buried him.” The neighbor was concerned. “That’s an awfully big […]

Cat jokes

A woman is walking in the park…

11 May , 2009  

A woman is walking in the park when she sees a man playing chess with his cat. She says to the man “I can’t believe what I’m seeing, a cat that plays chess, what a clever animal!!” The man replied “Nah lady this cats not clever at all I’m beating it 6 games to 1”

Cat jokes

For all of you with teenagers …

11 May , 2009  

For all of you with teenagers or who have had teenagers, or are a teenager, you may want to know why they really have a lot in common with cats: – Neither teenagers nor cats turn their heads when you call them by name. – No matter what you do for them, it is not […]

Car and train jokes

A man is driving along in the …

11 May , 2009  

A man is driving along in the Irish countryside, when he comes to a petrol station, since he’s in need of petrol, the man decides to stop. He says to the attendant at the station, “Fill it up, will you?”. The man says “Sorry – we’re right out of petrol.” So the man considers, and […]

Car and train jokes

One day there was a family dri…

11 May , 2009  

One day there was a family driving in the car to Michigan to visit their relatives. They were looking for the street they had to turn on to get to their relatives house. They accedently turned on the wrong street so they had to pull in a driveway and turn around. When they pulled into […]

Car and train jokes

As a senior citizen was drivin…

11 May , 2009  

As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his car phone rang. Answering, he heard his wife’s voice urgently warning him, “Herman, I just heard on the news that there’s a car going the wrong way on 280 Interstate. Please be careful!” “Hell,” said Herman, “It’s not just one car. It’s hundreds of them!”

Car and train jokes

A man was in court charged wit…

11 May , 2009  

A man was in court charged with parking his car in a restricted area. The judge asked if he had anything to say in his defense. “They shouldn’t put up such misleading notices,” said the man. “It said FINE FOR PARKING HERE.”

Car and train jokes

A grizzled old man was eating …

11 May , 2009  

A grizzled old man was eating in a truck stop when three Hell’s Angels’ bikers walked in. The first walked up to the old man, pushed his cigarette into the old man’s pie and then took a seat at the counter. The second walked up to the old man, spat into the old man’s milk […]

Business jokes

When Abraham Liebowitz gets to…

11 May , 2009  

When Abraham Liebowitz gets to school he discovers that he is the only Jewish kid in the class. But it’s a decent town and nobody really bothers him. One day the teacher asks the class “Who was the greatest person who ever lived? and why?” And to make it interesting she held a twenty dollar […]