What’s a shy and retiring accountant?An accountant who is half a million shy and that’s why he’s retiring.
Who was the first accountant?Adam. He got interested in figures, turned the first leaf, made the first entry, lost interest after withdrawal, buggered up the monthly accounts and raised the first liability.
Laws of Accounting1. Trial balances don’t2. Bank reconciliations never do3. Working Capital does not4. Return on Investments never will
How many cost accountants does it take to change a light bulb?Hmmm……..I’ll just do a few numbers and get back to you
How many auditors does it take to change a light bulb?How many did it take last year?
Why did he cross back?So he could charge the client for travel expenses.
Why did the auditor cross the road?Because he looked in the file and that’s what they did last year.
How do you know when an accountant’s on holidays?He doesn’t wear a tie to work and comes in after 8.30.
Why do accountants get excited on Saturdays?They can wear casual clothes to work
