An Indian, a Rabbi, the Pope, an Italian, and an Irishman all walk into a bar together and sit down. The bartender looks at all 5 of them and says, “What is this… some kind of joke?”

At the end of the night a man leaves the bar. Outside he sees a nun. He walks over to her and slaps her in the face. Then he punches her in the stomach and knocks her over. He proceeds to kick her several times and when he’s done he bends down to her and […]

A guy walks into a bar with a dog under his arm, puts the dog on the bar and announces that the dog can talk and that he has $100 he’s willing to bet anyone who says he can’t. The bartender quickly takes the bet and the owner looks at the dog and asks, “What’s […]

A snail goes into a bar and orders a beer. The barman says ‘Sorry we don’t serve snails’ and throws him out. A couple of weeks later the snail goes into the bar again and says… ‘What did you do that for!’

A Skeleton walks into a bar, asks for a beer… and a mop.

Ever hear the expression “hard drinker” ? Never made much senseto me, drinking’s one of the easiest things in the world to do.

Contrary to what people say, you can indeed drink to relax.Of course sometimes, you get so calm, you can’t move.

Remember, an alcoholic & a drunk are not the same thing at all.The alcoholic has to attend meetings.

Two ladies are in a bar and the first lady says, “Why are men the same as parking lots”. So the second lady says “I don’t know?” So the first lady says, ” all the good ones are taken and the ones that are left are handicap!”

A man walks into a bar with a piece of asphalt under his arm and asks the barman “Can I have a drink for me and one for the road?”

A group of loud and rowdy drunks were making a racket in the street. It was the wee small hours of the morning and the lady of the house flung open a window and shouted at them to keep quiet.”Is this where Frank lives?” one of the drunks asked.”Yes, it is,” the woman replied.”Well then,” […]

McPherson walked into a bar and ordered martini after martini, each time removing the olives and placing them in a jar. When the jar was filled with olives and all the drinks consumed, the Irishman started to leave. “S’cuse me,” said another bar patron, who was puzzled over what McPherson had done. “What was that […]