Why did the vampire go to hospital?He wanted his ghoulstones removed.

Doctor, doctor, I think I’ve been bitten by a vampire. Drink this glass of water. Will it make me better? No, but I’ll be able to see if your neck leaks.

What has webbed feet and fangs? Count Quackula.

How does a vampire get through life with only one fang? He has to grin and bare it.

How do vampires keep their breath smelling nice? They use extractor fangs.

What is the American national day for vampires?Fangsgiving Day.

Where did vampires go to first in America? New-fang-land.

What do you think of Dracula films? Fangtastic!

When he’s out driving, where does Dracula like to stop and eat?The Happy Biter.

Why did Dracula miss lunch? Because he didn’t fancy the stake.

What do you get if you cross Dracula with a snail? The world’s slowest vampire.

What is Dracula’s favorite pudding? Leeches and scream.