A stockbroker was cold calling about a penny stock and found a taker. “I think this one will really move said the broker, it’s only $1 a share.” “Buy me 1000 shares.” said the client. The next day the stock was at $2. The client called the broker and said, “You were right, give me […]

American businessman was at a pier in a small coastalMexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat were several large yellow-fintuna. The American complimented the Mexican on the quality ofhis fish and asked how long it took to catch them. The Mexican replied only a little while. The […]

One day an out of work mime is visiting the zoo and attemptsto earn some money as a street performer. Unfortunately, assoon as he starts to draw a crowd, a zoo keeper grabs him anddrags him into his office. The zoo-keeper explains to the mime that the zoo’s mostpopular attraction, a gorilla, has died suddenly […]

A businessman was confused about a bill he had received, sohe asked his secretary for some mathematical help. “If I were to give you $20,000, minus 14%, how much wouldyou take off?” he asked her. The secretary replied, “Everything but my earrings.”

An organization is like a tree full of monkeys… all on different limbs,… at different levels,… some climbing up. The monkeys on the top look down and see a tree full ofsmiling faces. The monkeys on the bottom look up and see nothing butassholes.

The farmer goes to town one day and happens to run into his old pal the tractor salesman.”How’s business?” asks the farmer. “Not very good, I haven’t sold a tractor in months, How are things on the farm?” asked the salesman.”Well– The other day I went out to the barn to milk that old cow […]

A fellow had just been hired as the new CEO of a large high tech corporation. The CEO who was stepping down met with him privately and presented him with three numbered envelopes. “Open these if you run up against a problem you don’t think you can solve,” he said. Well, things went along pretty […]

The new employee stood before the paper shredder looking confused. “Need some help?” a secretary asked. “Yes,” he replied. “How does this thing work?” “Simple,” she said, taking the fat report from his hand and feeding it into the shredder. “Thanks, but where do the copies come out?”

Fresh out of business school, the young man answered a wantad for an accountant. Now he was being interviewed by a verynervous man who ran a small business that he had started himself.”I need someone with an accounting degree,” the man said. “Butmainly, I’m looking for someone to do my worrying for me.””Excuse me?” the […]

A new business was opening and one of the owner’s friends wanted to send flowers for the occasion. They arrived at the new business site and the owner read the card; it said “Rest in Peace”. The owner was angry and called the florist to complain. After he had told the florist of the obvious […]