A football supporter’s favourite Christmas song?’Yule never walk alone’
What’s a hairdressers’s favourite Christmas song?’Oh comb all ye faithful’
Someone bought Scrooge a clock for Christmas. He put it straight in the bank.Why did he do that?He was trying to save time!
Elf: My favourite film is about the man who casts spells in the middle of a swamp.Father Christmas: That’s called ‘The Wizard of Ooze’!
Father Christmas: What’s your favourite Christmas story?Elf: The one where the three creatures are scared of the Big Bad Wolf and they grow on trees!Father Christmas: You mean ‘The Three Little Figs’.
Father Christmas:I like the story about the girl who steals from the rich and gives it all to Granny.Elf: That’s Little Red Robin Hood’!
Father Christmas: What’s your favourite Christmas story?Elf: The one about the ghost that steals porridge!Father Christmas: You mean ‘Ghoul-di-locks’!
Father Christmas: All right, my good lady, my face is my ticket.Box office attendant: Then you’d better watch out… there’s a feller inside who has the job of punching the tickets.
Father Christmas: Excuse me, but did I step on your toes on my way out to get an ice-cream?Lady: You certainly did!Father Christmas: Oh good! That means I’m back in the right row!
