After years of scrimping and saving, a husband told his wife the good news: “Honey, we’ve finally got enough money to buy what we started saving for in 1979.” “You mean a brand-new Cadillac?” she asked eagerly. “No,” said the husband, “a 1979 Cadillac.”
Did you hear about the Wall Street investment banker who won $10 million in the lottery? He’s so happy that he’s giving some serious thought to paying back his student loan.
Q: What do you call counterfeited German currency? A: Question marks.
Why was the struggling mange seen shaking the club cat ?To see if there was any more money in the kitty !
Mother: Why did you just swallow the money I gave you ?Son: Well you did say it was my lunch money !
A couple was having a discussion about family finances. Finally the husband exploded, “If it weren’t for my money, the house wouldn’t be here!” The wife replied, “My dear, if it weren’t for your money I wouldn’t be here.”
A guy noticed that his buddy was troubled and asked what was wrong.”Ohhh, it’s my girlfriend.””What’s the problem?””When I asked her if she could learn to love me, she asked me how much I was willing to spend on her education.”
What did the pay phone say when the quarter got stuck inside it? Money’s tight these days!
How do thunderstorms invest their money?-In a combination of liquid assets and frozen assets
Why shouldn’t you carry two half dollars in your pocket?Because two halves make a whole (hole), and you could lose your money.
Why is someone who borrows money but does not pay it all back like a football player?Because sometimes he gives you a quarter back and sometimes a half back.
