A famous art collector is walking through the city when he notices a mangy cat lapping milk from a saucer in the doorway of a store and he does a double take. He recognizes that the saucer is extremely old and very valuable, so he walks casually into the store and offers to buy the […]
What does a carpet salesman give his wife for Valentine’s Day? Rugs and kisses!
Ned: What does your Dad sell ?Ed: Salt.Ned: Well, my dad is a salt seller, too.Ed: Shake.
Customer: You said these pants were pure wool, but the label says “all cotton.”Salesman: Oh, that’s just to keep the moths away.
Salesman: Would you like to buy a pocket calculator?Customer: No, thanks. I know how many pockets I have.
Salesman: This jug is genuine Indian pottery.Customer: But it says “Made in Cleveland.”Salesman: Haven’t you ever heard of the Cleveland Indians?
Salesman: That suit looks nice. It fits like a bandage.Customer: Thanks. I bought it by accident.
Policeman: Why didn’t you check your speedometer?Driver: It broke when I hit 100.
An inexperienced real estate salesman asked his boss if he could refund the deposit to an angry customer who had discovered that the lot he had bought was under water.”What kind of salesman are you?” the boss scolded. “Get out there and sell him a boat.”
The top toothbrush salesman at the company was asked by his boss how he managed to sell so many brushes. He replied “It’s easy” and he pulled out his card table, setting his display of brushes on top. He told his boss, I lay the brushes out like this, and then I put out some […]
One day Mikey was sitting in his apartment when his doorbell unexpectedly rang. He answered the door and found a salesman standing on his porch with a strange object.”What is that?” Mikey asked. “It’s a thermos,” the salesman replied. “What does it do?” asked Mikey. “This baby,” the salesman said, “keeps hot things hot and […]
Salesman: Roll up, roll up! Come to our mammoth sale. Mammoth bargains to be had in our mammoth sale. Customer: Forget it! No one round here’s got room in their houses for a mammoth.
