A history jokeTeacher: When was Rome built?Pupil: At night.Teacher: Why did you say that?Pupil: Because my Dad always says that Rome wasn’t built in a day!
Father: I hear you skipped school to play footballSon: No I didn’t, and I have the fish to prove it!
Pupil (on phone) : My son has a bad cold and won’t be able to come to school today.School Secretary: Who is this?Pupil: This is my father speaking!
Teacher: You’re new here aren’t you, what’s your name?Pupil: Fred Mickey Smith
Teacher: Why is the Mississippi such an unusual river?Pupil: Because it has four eyes and can’t see!
Teacher: Are you good at math?Pupil: Yes and noTeacher: What do you mean?Pupil: Yes, I’m no good at math!
I failed every subject except for algebra.How did you keep from failing that?I didn’t take algebra!
Teacher: I’ll call you Fred Smith then.Pupil: My dad won’t like that.Teacher: Why is that?Pupil: He doesn’t like people taking the Mickey out of my name!
Son: I can’t go to school today. Father: Why not?Son: I don’t feel wellTeacher: Where don’t you feel well?Son: In school!
Teacher: You aren’t paying attention to me. Are you having trouble hearing?Pupil: No, teacher I’m having trouble listening!
Teacher: That’s quite a cough you have there, what are you taking for it?Pupil: I don’t know teacher. What will you give me?
