Principal: Do you do your homework?Kid: Now & ThenPrincipal: Where do you do it?Kid: Here & TherePrincipal: Put him in the closet!!!Kid: Hey, When will I get out?Principal: Oh, sooner or later
Mother: “Why are you home from school so early?” Son: “I was the only one who could answer a question.” Mother: “Oh, really? What was the question? Son: “Who threw the eraser at the principal?”
Pupil: The art teacher doesn’t like what I’m making ?Dad: Why is that, what are you making ?Pupil: Mistakes !
Teacher: Fred, I’m glad to see your writing has improved.Pupil: Thank youTeacher: Now I can see how bad your spelling is though !
Teacher: Why have you got cotton wool in your ears, do you have an infection ?Pupil: Well you keep saying that things go in one ear and out the other so I am trying to keep them it all in!
Teacher: Can you tell me something important that didn’t exist 100 years ago ?Pupil: Me !
Teacher: In music, if “f” means “forte”, what does “ff” mean ?Pupil: Eighty
Teacher: You seem very well read, have you read Shakespeare ?Pupil: No Teacher: What have you read then ?Pupil: Umm, I’ve got red hair !
Teacher: In what part of the world are the people most ignorant ?Pupil: Hong KongTeacher: Why do you say that ?Pupil: That’s where the atlas says the population is most dense !
Teacher: I wished you would pay a little attentionPupil: I’m paying as little as I can !
Teacher: What’s the longest word in the English language ?Pupil: Smiles – because there is a mile between the first and last letters
